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Friday, August 17, 2012

Delegate,Delete,Delay - (3D)


Delegate,Delete,Delay - (3D)

We all have only 24 hours in a day.
Finding a balance between work and family relations has always been a challenge for every corporate person. Let me share with you a simple technique that can help you find the time you need to enjoy both family and the demands at work.
Delegate. Never have an attitude that everything should be done by you. There are a lot of things that can be done if you simply learn the art of delegation. It can also be fun, because first you have to understand what needs to be done before you can successfully delegate. It requires proper planning, meeting and choosing the right person for the job. You need to plan ahead and decide what scope of the project can be delegated. This requires you to communicate better and take responsibility of the task to be done. You need to follow up consistently and make sure that the person you delegated the work to will be able to deliver on time. This can foster team building. People avoid delegating because they either have a communication problem or they do not want to share or teach others. They are not being a leader, nor a team player. Communication is what a leader does and it is the key to any successful endeavor.
As the famous excuse goes, “Oh, my plate is so full” but as my partner’ Vijay always says to me, “Get a bigger plate.”
Delete. Give time every morning to make a list of the things you think need to be done for that day. Prioritize and rewrite it again. Separate the urgent things from the important things.
The urgent things on your list today are the things that you failed to prepare and plan for in the past. It is now an emergency only because of your failure to plan.
The important things in your list are the items that are not an emergency, but you know damn well that they will benefit you in the future; things like saving money, spending time building a relationship, learning a language, developing a skill, getting healthy etc. Items that you will not need, you do not put in your list, such as, smoking, drinking, gambling, idle gossiping, going window shopping and other such senseless activities that will not add value to what you want to achieve nor will harness any of the skills you need to be successful. Be mindful of such useless activities and delete them.
Delay. You can delay projects or things that cannot be delegated or deleted. These things will probably need your personal attention, but not immediately, but make sure that you mark them on your calendar. Putting it on the calendar is a commitment that you make and the days leading to that day can be small preparation(s) that will not take up so much of your time in your already busy schedule. ‘Busy-ness’ is a state of mind and a disease of the heart. In reality, 24 hours a day is perfectly crafted and created by God and we should never think that there is a flaw with time or that somehow there is not enough time in the day to do things of relevance to create a happy life.
Please take a moment to ponder and learn how to delegate, delete and delay.
This will give you the balance that you need. Do not blame work or family. No one forced you to be where you are. It is your choice, so please learn to manage your life.

Thursday, August 16, 2012

Principles of Decision Making

We cannot avoid making decisions. Right or wrong, decisions are made every minute of the day. They are unavoidable. And if we try to avoid making decisions, someone else will make them for us.
Do you really want to put your life and decisions about your life in the hands of someone else?
It is best to make our own decisions. Making decisions is a way of moving forward in life. Not making decisions is to stagnate and die.
We are faced with challenging decisions about our lives every day; from the simplest to the most complex tasks.
Let me share with you some points and principles on decision-making to make the task easier and more rewarding.

  1. Do not make decisions when you are feeling angry or emotional.
  1. If you make decisions during these times, you are likely to end up regretting the decision you make. Decisions made under the influence of these emotions are always subjective and destructive and will do neither you nor anyone else any good. All good decisions are made when a person is sober and clear-headed, as this is the state of mind in which we can think most objectively.
  1. Do not make a decision until you have heard all sides of the story.
  1. Do not assume you know everything needed to make a particular decision. Talk to people who are experienced about the subject. Not only will they present you with new options, but their insights could completely change the way you think about your decision. You must always be willing to hear an opposing view. Be as detached and objective as possible from the task and the decision-making process.
  1. Consider all your possible options.
  1. I have yet to meet a decision maker, good or bad, who had checked out all available options. You can invariably come up with options never considered, or hear options you would never have thought of yourself.
  1. Do not make decisions when you are under pressure.
  1. Remember the oldest technique in the book of selling; sales people will use pressure to try to make you decide in haste:
  1. Do a reality check before making a decision.
  1. Make a list of things that can go wrong and the things that probably will go wrong. Keep the number of things that must go right for the decision to succeed to a minimum. At the end of the day, there are no wrong or right decisions per se, but we do need to be prepared to correct some decisions to make them better. Expect the worst and work for the best. If you did not make the best decision the first time around, this is great if you can learn from it! But do not stop there. Be sure to continue to manage your decisions and your decision making processes.


  1. “It’s the last best deal in town… you cannot let this go! You will lose this deal, you have to decide NOW!”
    Do not fall for this old trick… if the deal is not there when you are ready, then it is not the deal for you. There will be plenty more deals waiting for you when you are ready to make a decision.
Good decision making comes from disciplined thinking. If you follow some of these basic principles before making decisions, the results of your decisions are most likely to work. If you think haphazardly when you make a decision, then little of what you plan will eventually work out.
Good decision making is habit forming. Each time you make the right decision, you gain more self-confidence to keep making good decisions.
Please take a moment to ponder… Follow some of these basic principles before making your next important decision(s); these principles are most crucial to remember and apply.

Tuesday, August 14, 2012

Changing the World


Changing the World

I once saw a picture of this old man who was deep in thought.
He had this story to tell… 
 “When I was young, I wanted to change the world. As I got older and wiser, I realized I couldn’t do it.
So I thought, let me try changing my community. I got even older and wiser, but I couldn’t do that either.
Then, I wanted to change my family – my wife and children. I failed at that too.
Now I’m so old and with all this wisdom I’ve gained, I finally understand that the only thing I can actually change is me.
Hopefully by this change, I can influence my family members. They can, then, influence the community who can eventually change the world.”
The only real change one can make is to oneself, and that should be the real focus.
The faults we see in others are actually a reflection of the faults in ourselves.

We should learn to forgive and forget minor incidents

We should learn to forgive and forget minor incidents

Yudhisthira Maharaja describing the glories of forgiveness cited the verse spoken in ancient times by the Rsi Kasyapa:

‘Forgiveness is virtue, forgiveness is sacrifice and forgiveness is the Vedas. Forgiveness is purity and penance; it is truth, piety, religion, and the holy Narayana. Through forgiveness the universe is sustained, and by practicing forgiveness a man can attain to everlasting regions of bliss.’

“How then can I renounce forgiveness, O Draupadi, in which is established spirituality, truth, wisdom and the three worlds? Both this world and the next belong to the forgiving person. Therefore forgiveness is considered the highest virtue.”

Srila Prabhupada mentions in Srimad-Bhagavatam 6.4.5
A sadhu, a devotee, is never angry. Actually the real feature of devotees who undergo tapasya, austerity, is forgiveness.

In another letter Srila Prabhupada writes:
We should learn to forget and forgive minor incidents because whenever there are two men in a place, there is always some misunderstanding.

Tips for a Better Sleep


Tips for a Better Sleep

The quality and quantity of your sleep can make a sizable difference on how productive you'll be the next day. Here are few tips to help you get the sleep you need and deserve:

1. Unwind early in the evening. Try to deal with worries and distractions several hours before bedtime.

2. Give yourself "permission" to go to bed.
Recognize that some minimum amount of sleep is essential for body to rejuvenate.

3. Develop a sleep ritual. Doing the same things each night just before bed signals your body to settle down for the night.

4. Keep regular hours. Keep your biological clock in check by going to bed around the same time each night and waking up close to the same time each morning – even on weekends.

5. Create a restful place to sleep. Sleep in a cool, dark room that is free from noises that may disturb your sleep.

6. Sleep on a comfortable, supportive mattress. It's difficult to sleep on a bed that's too small, too soft or too hard.

7. Exercise regularly. Regular exercise can help relieve daily tension and stress – but don't exercise too close to bedtime or you may have trouble falling asleep.

It is easier to criticize…


It is easier to criticize…

Once upon a time there was a painter who had just completed his course under disciple hood of a great painter. This young artist decided to assess his skills. He decided to give his best strokes on the canvass. He took 3 days and painted beautiful scenery.
He wanted people's opinion about his caliber and painting skills.

He put his creation at a busy street-crossing. And just down below a board which read-"Gentlemen, I have painted this piece. Since I'm new to this profession I might have committed some mistakes in my strokes etc. Please put a cross wherever you see a mistake."

While he came back in the evening to collect his painting he was completely shattered to see that whole canvass was filled with Xs (crosses) and some people had even written their comments on the painting.

Disheartened and broken completely he ran to his master's place and burst into tears. Sobbing and crying he told his master about what happened and showed the pathetic state of his creation which was filled with crosses and correction remarks.

This young artist was breathing heavily and master heard him saying "I'm useless and if this is what I have learnt to paint I'm not worth becoming a painter. People have rejected me completely. I feel like dying"

Master smiled and suggested "My Son, I will prove that you are a great artist and have learnt a flawless painting." Young disciple couldn't believe it and said "I have lost faith in me and I don't think I am good enough. Don't make false hopes..

"Do as I say without questioning it. It WILL work." Master interrupted him.

 Young artist reluctantly agreed and two days later early morning he presented a replica of his earlier painting to his master. Master took that gracefully and smiled.

"Come with me." master said.

They reached the same street-square early morning and displayed the same painting exactly at the same place. Now master took out another board which read -"Gentlemen, I have painted this piece. Since I'm new to this profession I might have committed some mistakes in my strokes etc. I have put a box with colors and brushes just below. Please do a favor. If you see a mistake, kindly pick up the brush and correct it." Master and disciple walked back home.

They both visited the place same evening. Young painter was surprised to see that actually there was not a single correction done so far. Next day again they visited and found painting remained untouched. They say the painting was kept there for a month for no correction came in!

It is easier to criticize, but difficult to improve. If you want to help people improve their behavior it is worth investing your effort in learning how to help people change their behaviors, attitudes and skills. Also, always remember not to get carried away or judge yourself by someone else’s criticism and feel depressed. Take criticism in your stride; consider that which are genuine and implement those which you think is the best to improve you as a person!!

No one can hurt you without your consent


No one can hurt you without your consent

On the first day, as President Abraham Lincoln entered to give his inaugural address, just in the middle, one man stood up. He was a rich aristocrat. He said, “Mr. Lincoln, you should not forget that your father used to make shoes for my family.” And the whole Senate laughed; they thought they had made a fool of Abraham Lincoln.

But Lincoln --- and that type of people are made of a totally different mettle. Lincoln looked at the man and said, “Sir I know that my father used to make shoes in your house for your family, and there will be many others here…. Because the way he made shoes; nobody else can. He was a creator. His shoes were not just shoes; he poured his whole soul in it. I want to ask you, have you any complaint? Because I know how to make shoes myself. If you have any complaint I can make another pair of shoes. But as far as I know, nobody has ever complained about my father’s shoes. He was a genius, a great creator and I am proud of my father”.

The whole Senate was struck dumb. They could not understand what kind of man Abraham Lincoln was. He was proud because his father did the job so well that not even a single complaint had ever been heard.

Remember:
“No one can hurt you without your consent.”

“It is not what happens to us that hurts us. It is our response that hurts us.”

Search for the grain of truth in other opinions


Search for the grain of truth in other opinions

Almost everyone feels that their own opinions are good ones; otherwise they wouldn’t be sharing them with you. One of the destructive things that many of us do, however, is compare someone else’s opinion to our own. And, when it doesn’t fall in line with our belief, we either dismiss it or find fault with it. We feel smug, the other person feels diminished, and we learn nothing.

Almost every opinion has some merit, especially if we are looking for merit, rather than looking for errors. The next time someone offers you an opinion, rather than judge or criticize it, see if you can find a grain of truth in what the person is saying. If you think about it, when you judge someone else or their opinion, it really doesn’t say anything about the other person, but it says quite a bit about your need to be judgmental.

If you practice this simple idea, some wonderful things will begin to happen: you’ll begin to understand those you interact with, other will be drawn to your accepting and loving energy, your learning curve will be enhanced, and perhaps most important, you’ll feel much better about yourself.


Opportunities to do good…


Opportunities to do good…

There is a nine-year-old kid sitting at his desk and all of a sudden, there is a puddle between his feet and the front of his pants are wet.

He thinks his heart is going to stop because he cannot possibly imagine how this has happened. He knows that when the boys find out, they will make fun of him.

The boy believes his heart is going to stop; he puts his head down and prays, "Dear God, this is an emergency! I need help now! Five minutes from now I'm dead."

He looks up from his prayer and here comes the teacher with a look in her eyes that says he has been discovered.

As the teacher is walking toward him, a classmate named Ravi is carrying a jug that is filled with water. Ravi trips in front of the teacher and mysteriously dumps the bowl of water in the boy's lap.

The boy pretends to be angry, but all the while is saying to himself, "Thank you, Lord! Thank you, Lord!"

All of a sudden, instead of being the object of ridicule, the boy is the object of sympathy. The teacher rushes him downstairs and gives him gym shorts to put on while his pants dry out.

All the other children are on their hands and knees cleaning up around his desk. The sympathy is wonderful. But as life would have it, the ridicule that should have been his has been transferred to someone else - Ravi.

Finally, at the end of the day, as they are waiting for the bus, the boy walks over to Ravi and whispers, “You did that on purpose, didn't you?"

Ravi whispers back, "I wet my pants once too."

Each and everyone one of us are going through tough times. May God help us see the opportunities that are always around us to do good.

Practice humility – Do not try to prove yourself to others

Practice humility – Do not try to prove yourself to others

Humility and inner peace go hand in hand. The less compelled you are to try to prove yourself to others, the easier it is to feel peaceful inside.

Proving yourself is a dangerous trap. It takes an enormous amount of energy to be continually pointing out your accomplishments, bragging, or trying to convince others of your worth as a human being. Pride and arrogance actually dilutes the positive feelings you receive from an accomplishment or something you are proud of. To make matters worse, the more you try to prove yourself, the more others will avoid you, talk behind your back about your insecure need to boast, and perhaps even dislike you.

Ironically, however, the less you care about seeking approval, the more approval you seem to get. People are drawn to those with a quiet, inner confidence, people who don’t need to make themselves look good, be “right” all the time, or steal the glory.
Most people love a person who doesn’t need to show-off, a person who shares from his or her heart and not from his or her ego.

Surrendering to the fact that life isn’t fair

Surrendering to the fact that life isn’t fair

One of the mistakes many of us make is that we feel sorry for ourselves, or for others, thinking that life should be fair, or that someday it will be. It’s not and it won’t. When we make this mistake we tend to spend a lot of time complaining about what’s wrong with life. We commiserate with others, discussing the injustices of life. “It’s not fair,” we complain, not realizing that, perhaps, it was never intended to be.

One of the nice things about surrendering to the fact that life isn’t fair is that it keeps us from feeling sorry for ourselves by encouraging us to do the very best we can with what we have. We know it’s not “life job” to make everything perfect, it’s our own challenge. Surrendering to this fact also keeps us from feeling sorry for others because we are reminded that every one is dealt with a different hand, and everyone has unique strengths and challenges, according to Law of Karma.

The fact that life isn’t fair doesn’t mean we shouldn’t do everything in our power to improve our own lives or the world as a whole. To the contrary, it suggests that we should. When we don’t recognize or admit that life isn’t fair, we tend to feel pity for others and for ourselves. Pity, of course, is a self-defeating emotion that does nothing for anyone, except to make everyone feel worse than they already do.

When we do recognize that life isn’t fair, however, we feel compassion for others and for ourselves. And compassion is a heartfelt emotion that delivers loving-kindness to everyone it touches. The next time you find yourself thinking about the injustices of the world, try reminding yourself of this very basic fact. You may be surprised that it can nudge you out of self-pity into helpful action.


Try to put your problems on your back burner


Try to put your problems on your back burner

Using you back burner means allowing your mind to solve a problem while you are busy doing something else.

The back burner of your mind works in the same way as the back burner of a stove. While on low heat, the cooking process mixes, blends, and simmers the ingredients into a tasty meal. The way you prepare a meal is to put various ingredients into the pot, mix them up, and leave them alone. Often the less you interfere, the better the result.

In much the same way, we can solve many of life’s problems (serious and otherwise) if we feed the back burner of our mind with a list of problems, facts, and variables, and possible solutions. Just as when we make soup or a sauce, the thoughts and ideas we feed the back burner of our mind must be left alone to simmer properly.

Whether you are struggling to solve a problem or can’t remember a person’s name, your back burner is always available to help you. It puts our quieter, softer, and sometimes most intelligent source of thinking to work for us on issues that we have no immediate answer for.

The back burner is not a prescription for denial or procrastination. In other words, while you do want to put your problems on your back burner, you don’t want to turn the burner off. Instead, you want to gently hold the problem in your mind without actively analyzing it. This simple technique will help you solve many problems and will greatly reduce the stress and effort in your life.

Reason we are tempted to put others down

Reason we are tempted to put others down

You have chances to point out to someone their mistakes, things they could or should have done differently, ways they can improve. You have chances to “correct” people, privately as well as in front of others.

However, most of the time, the reason we are tempted to put others down, correct them, or show them how we’re right and they’re wrong is that our ego mistakenly believes that if we point out how someone else is wrong, we must be right, and therefore we will feel better.

Actually, however, if you pay attention to the way you feel after you put someone down, you’ll notice that you feel worse than before the put-down.

Avoid putting others down, correct them, or show them how you are right and how they are wrong. Do it only when it is absolutely necessary and when it is your duty as a parent, guardian or a friend to do so.

The power of words

The power of words

A group of frogs were traveling through the woods, and two of them fell into a deep pit. When the other frogs saw how deep the pit was, they told the two frogs that they were as good as dead. The two frogs ignored the comments and tried to jump up out of the pit with all their might. The other frogs kept telling them to stop, that they were as good as dead. Finally, one of the frogs took heed to what the other frogs were saying and gave up. He fell down and died.

The other frog continued to jump as hard as he could. Once again, the crowd of frogs yelled at him to stop the pain and just die. He jumped even harder and finally made it out. When he got out, the other frogs said, "Did you not hear us?" The frog explained to them that he was deaf. He thought they were encouraging him the entire time.

This story teaches two lessons:
1. There is power of life and death in the tongue. An encouraging word to someone who is down can lift them up and help them  make it through the day.
2. A destructive word to someone who is down can be what it takes to kill them.

Be careful of what you say. Speak life to those who cross your path. The power of words... it is sometimes hard to understand that an encouraging word can go such a long way. Anyone can speak words that tend to rob another of the spirit to continue in difficult times. Special is the individual who will take the time to encourage another.

Actual fearlessness & freedom from all worries

Actual fearlessness & freedom from all worries

Death was walking toward a city one morning and a man asked, "What are you going to do?"

"I'm going to take 100 people." Death replied.

"That's horrible" the man said.

"That's the way it is." Death said. "That's what I do."

The man hurried to warn everyone he could about Death's plan.

As evening fell, he met Death again. "You told me you were going to take 100 people," the man said, "Why did 1,000 die?"

"I kept my word" Death responded. "I only took 100 people. Worry took the other...."

Worry is, and always will be, a fatal disease, for its beginning signals the end of faith. Worry intrudes on God's compassionate ability to provide & protect us. When we allow our problems to overshadow God's promises, we unknowingly, doom ourselves to defeat.

That was never part of God's eternal plans. Release the regrets of yesterday and refuse the fears of tomorrow.

Although the time factor is fearful to everyone, fear personified is afraid of the Supreme Lord, who is therefore known as abhaya, fearless. Taking shelter of the Supreme Lord brings actual fearlessness & freedom from all worries. - Srimad-Bhagavatam 6.9.21

Hear with an open mind

Hear with an open mind

Nan-in, a Japanese master received a university professor who came to inquire about the Absolute Truth.

Nan-in served tea. He poured his visitor's cup full, and then kept on pouring.

The professor watched the overflow until he no longer could restrain himself. "It is overfull. No more will go in!"

"Like this cup," Nan-in said, "you are full of your own opinions and speculations. How can I show you the Absolute Truth unless you first empty your cup?"

Hence it’s very important when we hear or take association from seniors; we go with an empty cup and hear with an open mind, keeping aside our own opinions and speculations. 

Forgiving others is the best attitude to take

Forgiving others is the best attitude to take

A kindergarten teacher decided to let her class play a game. The teacher told each child in the class to bring along a plastic bag containing a few potatoes. Each potato will be given a name of a person that the child hates, so the number of potatoes that a child will put in his/her plastic bag will depend on the number of people he/she hates.

So when the day came, every child brought some potatoes with the name of the people he/she hated. Some had 2 potatoes; some 3 while some up to 5 potatoes.

The teacher then told the children to carry with them the potatoes in the plastic bag wherever they go (even to the toilet) for one week. Days after days passed by, and the children started to complain due to the unpleasant smell let out by the rotten potatoes. Besides, those having 5 potatoes also had to carry heavier bags. After one week, the children were relieved because the game had finally ended.

The teacher asked: "How did you feel while carrying the potatoes with you for one week?" The children let out their frustrations and started complaining of the trouble that they had to go through having to carry the heavy and smelly potatoes wherever they go.

Then the teacher told them the hidden meaning behind the game. The teacher said: "This is exactly the situation when you carry your hatred for somebody inside your heart. The stench of hatred will contaminate your heart and you will carry it with you wherever you go. If you cannot tolerate the smell of rotten potatoes for just one week, can you imagine what is it like to have the stench of hatred in your heart for your lifetime???"

Throw away any hatred for anyone from your heart. Forgiving others is the best attitude to take! 

Good ideas are not the monopoly of the educated


Good ideas are not the monopoly of the educated

A lady bought some bathing soaps from a shop. When she opened one of the packets, she found that it was empty. There was no soap in there; it was just an empty wrapper! She lodged a complaint against the manufacturer and got her claim. That being settled, there was a task before the management of the soap factory. How had this happened? How could they ensure that the incident did not occur again? They had suffered enough bad publicity besides having to pay the compensation to the lady.

After a detailed investigation, it was discovered, that during the process of wrapping, it so happened that inevitably, one or two wrappers did get through, having no bar of soap in them! There was no way to make out the difference between a full wrapper and an empty one. The process of handling each one separately for this purpose seemed to be very cumbersome. So, the technical head was given the job of devising a method to overcome the problem. The man prepared a detailed report and proposed the setting up of a computer based system that would weigh and scan each bar, for the empty packs would not get detected by a normal x-ray machine. He proposed an expenditure of a large amount to put this system into place.

The management heard him out and passed the order to release the funds and to buy the machinery that he had proposed. An uneducated worker said, “Excuse me Sir, for my impertinence, but I have a solution that shall cost a fraction of what you are planning to go in for.”

The management hesitated initially. But eventually they heard him out and agreed to try out his proposal. The next day, the worker brought a strong industrial fan. He put it at an angle near the conveyor belt on which the packed soap bars were coming through and switched it on. The few empty wrappers that came through got blown off by the fan! The rest of them went past easily.

A simple solution, for a complex problem! This goes to prove that ideas are not the monopoly of the educated. 

Let us shape ourselves first


Let us shape ourselves first

There was a millionaire who was bothered by severe eye pain. He consulted so many physicians and was getting his treatment done. He did not stop consulting galaxy of medical experts; he consumed heavy loads of drugs and underwent hundreds of injections.

But the ache persisted with great vigor than before. At last a monk who was supposed to be an expert in treating such patients was called for by the millionaire. The monk understood his problem and said that for sometime he should concentrate only on green colors and not to fall his eyes on any other colors. The millionaire got together a group of painters and purchased barrels of green color and directed that every object his eye was likely to fall to be painted in green color just as the monk had directed.

When the monk came to visit him after few days, the millionaire's servants ran with buckets of green paints and poured on him since he was in red dress, lest their master not see any other color and his eye ache would come back.

Hearing this the monk laughed and said "If only you had purchased a pair of green spectacles, worth just a few rupees, you could have saved these walls and trees and pots and all other articles and also could have saved a large share of his fortune. You cannot paint the world green!"

Let us change our vision and the world will appear accordingly. It is foolish to shape the world, let us shape ourselves first.

Let’s change our vision first..!!

Before we give any criticism

Before we give any criticism

A young couple move into a new neighborhood. The next morning, while they are eating breakfast, the young woman sees her neighbor hang the wash outside.

"That laundry is not very clean", she said, "she doesn't know how to wash properly. Perhaps she needs better laundry soap".

Her husband looked on, but remained silent. Every time her neighbor would hang her wash to dry, the young woman would make the same comments.

About one month later, the woman was surprised to see a nice clean wash on the line and said to her husband: "Look! She has learned how to wash properly. I wonder who taught her this."

The husband said: "I got up early this morning and cleaned our windows!"

And so it is with life: "What we see when watching others depends on the purity of the window through which we look. Before we give any criticism, it might be a good idea to check our state of mind and ask ourselves if we are ready to see the good rather than to be looking for something in the person we are about to judge."

Avoid weatherproofing

Avoid weatherproofing

Just as we can weatherproof a home by looking for cracks, leaks, and imperfections, we can also weatherproof our relationships, even our lives, by doing the very same thing. Essentially, weatherproofing means that you are on the careful lookout for what needs to be fixed or repaired. It’s finding the cracks and flaws, and either trying to fix them, or at least point them out to others. This tendency encourages you to think about what’s wrong with everything and everyone --- what you don’t like.

You begin to notice little faults about your colleague (or friend, whoever), that you feel could be improved upon. You bring it to their attention. You might say, “You know, you sure have a tendency to be late.” Or, I’ve noticed you don’t read very much.” The point is, you’ve begun what inevitably turns into a way of life --- looking for and thinking about what you don’t like about someone, or something that isn’t quite right.

Obviously, an occasional comment, constructive criticism, or helpful guidance isn’t cause for alarm. Occasional harmless comments have a tendency to become a way of looking at life.

When you are weatherproofing another human being, it says nothing about them --- but it does define you as someone who needs to be critical.

Whether you have a tendency to weatherproof your relationships, certain aspects of your life, or both, what you need to do is write off weatherproofing as a bad idea. As the habit creeps into your thinking, catch yourself and seal your lips. You will be happier person and feel much better.

You may do weatherproofing, fault finding and corrections, if it is your assigned duty. Otherwise, avoid it.

Drinking cold water after a meal = Cancer!

Drinking cold water after a meal = Cancer!

It is nice to have a cup of cold drink after a meal. However, the cold water will solidify the oily stuff that you have just consumed. It will slow down the digestion.

Once this 'sludge' reacts with the acid, it will break down and be absorbed by the intestine faster than the solid food. It will line the intestine.

Very soon, this will turn into fats and lead to cancer.

It is best to drink hot or warm water after a meal.

Brain damaging habits

Brain damaging habits
No Breakfast
People who do not take breakfast are going to have a lower blood sugar level. This leads to an insufficient supply of nutrients to the brain causing brain degeneration.

Overeating
Overeating causes hardening of the brain arteries, leading to a decrease in mental power.

High Sugar consumption
Too much sugar will interrupt the absorption of proteins and nutrients causing malnutrition and may interfere with brain development.

Air Pollution
The brain is the largest oxygen consumer in our body. Inhaling polluted air decreases the supply of oxygen to the brain, bringing about a decrease in brain efficiency.

Sleep Deprivation
Sleep allows our brain to rest. Long term deprivation from sleep will accelerate the death of brain cells.

Head covered while sleeping

Sleeping with the head covered will increase the concentration of CO2 (carbon-di-oxide) and decrease the concentration of O2 (Oxygen) that may lead to the brain damaging effects.

Working your brain during illness

Working hard or studying with sickness may lead to a decrease in effectiveness of the brain as well as damage the brain.

Be willing to learn


Be willing to learn

Many of us are reluctant to learn from the people closest to us—our authorities, colleagues, staff and friends. Rather than being open to learning, we close ourselves off out of embarrassment, fear, stubbornness, or pride. It's almost as if we say to ourselves, "I have already learned all that I can [or want to learn] from this person; there is nothing else I can [or need to] learn."

It's sad, because often the people closest to us know us the best. They are sometimes able to see ways in which we are acting in a self-defeating manner and can offer very simple solutions. If we are too proud or stubborn to learn, we lose out on some wonderful, simple ways to improve our lives.

Remain open to the suggestions of your authorities and other devotees. Ask senior devotees and authorities, "What are some of my blind spots?" By this simple process you end up getting some good advice. It's such a simple shortcut for growth, yet almost no one uses it. All it takes is a little courage and humility, and the ability to let go of your ego. This is especially true if you are in the habit of ignoring suggestions, taking them as criticism.

Pick something that you feel the person whom you are asking is qualified to answer. Sometimes the advice we get usually prevents us from having to learn something the hard way.

Spend Half Day in a Graveyard

Spend Half Day in a Graveyard

A physician gave some rather whimsical advice to a patient, an aggressive, go-getter type of businessman. Excitedly the businessman told the doctor what an enormous amount of work he had to do and that he had to get it done right away or else things will fall apart.

“I take my brief case home every night and it’s packed with work,” he said with nervous inflection.

“Why do you take work home with you at night?” the doctor asked quietly.

“I have to get it done,” he fumed.

“Can’t someone else do it, or help you with it?” asked the doctor.

“No,” the man snapped. “I am the only one who can do it. It must be done just right, and I alone can do it as it must be done, and it has to be done quickly. Everything depends upon me.”

“If I write a prescription, will you follow it?” asked the doctor.

This, believe it or not was the prescription. His patient was to take off half-day a week and spend that half-day in cemetery.

In astonishment the patient demanded, “Why should I spend a half-day in a cemetery?”

“Because,” answered the doctor, “I want you to wander around and look at the gravestones of men who are there permanently. I want you to meditate on the fact that many of them are there because they thought even as you do, that the whole world rested on their shoulders. Meditate on the fact that when you get there permanently the world will go on just the same &, as important as you are, others will be able to do the work you are now doing.”

The patient got the idea. He stopped fuming & fretting. He got peaceful and developed a more competent organization & his business is in better condition.

We simply wait for our chance to speak

We simply wait for our chance to speak

If you observe the conversations around you, you’ll notice that, often, what many of us do is simply wait for our chance to speak. We’re not really listening to the other person, but simply waiting for an opening to express our own view. We often complete other people’s sentences, or say things like, “Yeah, yeah,” or “I know,” very rapidly, urging them to hurry up so that we can have our turn.

This harried form of communication encourages us to criticize points of view, overreact, misinterpret meaning, and form opinions, all before our fellow communicator is even finished speaking. No wonder we are so often annoyed, bothered, and irritated with one another. Sometimes, with our poor listening skills, it’s a miracle that we have any friends at all!

You’ll be pleasantly amazed at the softer reactions and looks of surprise as you let others completely finish their thought before you begin yours. Often, you will be allowing someone to feel listened to for the very first time. You will sense a feeling of relief coming from the person to whom you are speaking – and a much calmer, less rushed feeling between the two of you.

No need to worry that you won’t get your turn to speak --- you will. In fact, it will be more rewarding to speak because the person you are speaking to will pick up on your respect and patience and will begin to do the same.

One day I will be happy…

One day I will be happy…

Sadly, many of us keep convincing ourselves, “Someday I’ll be happy.” We tell ourselves ‘I’ll behappy when I will be a president, when I will be doing so and so service, get a particular mobile phone’ etc. We convince ourselves that life will be better after we get married, then another, then another, on and on and on we go with our wish list.

Meanwhile, life keeps moving forward. The truth is, there’s no better time to be happy than right now. If not now, when?

Your life will always be filled with challenges. It’s best to admit this to yourself and decide tobe happy anyway.

A wise man said, “For a long time it had seemed to me that life was about to begin – real life. But there was always some obstacle in the way, something to be got through first, some unfinished invention, a debt to be paid. Then life would begin. At last it dawned on me that these obstacles were my life.”

A low mood is not the time to analyze your life

A low mood is not the time to analyze your life

In low moods we lose our perspective and everything seems urgent. We completely forget that when we are in a good mood, everything seems so much better. We experience the identical circumstances – who we are married to, where we work, the car we drive, our potential, our childhood – entirely differently, depending on our mood!

When we are low, rather than blaming our mood as would be appropriate, we instead tend to feel that our whole life is wrong. It’s almost as if we actually believe that our lives have fallen apart in the past hour or two.

The truth is, life is almost never as bad as it seems when you’re in a low mood. Rather than staying stuck in a bad temper, convinced you are seeing life realistically, you can learn to question your judgment. Remind yourself, “of course I’m feeling defensive (or angry, frustrated, stressed, depressed); I’m in a bad mood. I always feel negative when I’m low”.

When you’re in an ill mood, learn to pass it off as simply that: an unavoidable human condition that will pass with time, if you leave it alone. A low mood is not the time to analyze your life. To do so is emotional suicide. If you have a legitimate problem, it will still be there when your state of mind improves.

The trick is to be grateful for our good moods and graceful in our low moods not taking them too seriously.

The next time you feel low, for whatever reason, remind yourself, “This too shall pass.” It will. 

Anxious about the future?

Anxious about the future? 

Once two villagers were sitting under a tree and watching the sunset. They were very close friends. After sitting quietly for some time, one asked the other, "What are you thinking?"

"I am planning to buy five acres of land, a garden." The other friend immediately said, "Don't buy the garden!"

The first one was surprised. He asked "why"? The second one replied, "I am planning to buy a buffalo. Then, my buffalo will enter your garden and we will fight, have misunderstandings and lose our friendship. I do not want to lose our friendship."

The first one said, "Then, you cancel your plan of buying a buffalo. I am going to buy my garden." The second one said, "No, no, no. I have already decided to buy a buffalo." Thefirst one said, "How will your buffalo enter my garden? I will fence it thoroughly."

The second one said, "No, you see it can just enter; a buffalo is a buffalo. Who can stop it? It can do anything."

They started fighting. The fight went to such an extent that they broke their limbs! Neither has bought buffalo nor any land.

Nothing has happened. Just the mind’s race and both of them broke their limbs over it!

Our fears are also like that. The future has not yet come. But you just sit there and think, "Oh! What will happen? This will happen. That will happen."

Many times our minds are filled with anxiety about the future! In this run, the mind gets into such a mess.

Don’t be over anxious about the future.

One day I decided to quit...


One day I decided to quit...

One day I decided to quit... I quit my job, my relationship, my spirituality... I wanted to quit my life. I went to the woods to have one last talk with God. "God", I said. "Can you give me one good reason not to quit?" His answer surprised me...

"Look around", He said. "Do you see the fern and the bamboo?"

When I planted the fern and the bamboo seeds, I took very good care of them. I gave them light. I gave them water. The fern quickly grew from the earth. Its brilliant green covered the floor. Yet nothing came from the bamboo seed. But I did not quit on the bamboo.

In the second year the fern grew more vibrant and plentiful.

And again, nothing came from the bamboo seed. But I did not quit on the bamboo. He said.

"In the third year, there was still nothing from the bamboo seed. But I would not quit. In the fourth year, again, there was nothing from the bamboo seed. "I would not quit." He said. "Then in the fifth year a tiny sprout emerged from the earth.

Compared to the fern it was seemingly small and insignificant...  But just 6 months later the bamboo rose to over 100 feet tall. It had spent the five years growing roots. Those roots made it strong and gave it what it needed to survive. I would not give any of my creations a challenge it could not handle."

He said to me. "Did you know, my child, that all this time you have been struggling, you have actually been growing roots."

"I would not quit on the bamboo. I will never quit on you." He said. "The bamboo had a different purpose than the fern ... Yet, they both make the forest beautiful."

Your time will come," God said to me. "You will rise high! "

God will never give up on you. He will never give up on you.

Keep going...


See something positive in every person and in every situation

See something positive in every person and in every situation

Andrew Carnegie came to America from Scotland as a young boy. He started out by doing odd jobs and ended up as one of the largest steel manufacturers in United States.

At one time, he had 43 millionaires working for him. A million dollars is a lot of money today, but in the 1920s it was worth much more.

Someone once asked Mr. Carnegie how he dealt with people. Andrew Carnegie replied, "Dealing with people is a lot like digging for gold: When you go digging for an ounce of gold you have to move tons of dirt. But when you go digging, you don't go looking for the dirt, you go looking for the gold."

Andrew Carnegie's reply has a very important message. Though sometimes it may not be apparent there is something positive in every person and every situation. We have to dig deep to look for the positive.

Tips for keeping good health


Tips for keeping good health

Take 10 - 30 minutes walk everyday.

Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants and eat less food that is manufactured in plants. Take more of sprouts and salads.

Drink plenty of water.

Don't waste your precious energy on gossip.

Forget issues of the past. Don't remind yourself of mistakes of the past. That will ruin your present happiness.

Don't have negative thoughts or things you cannot control.

Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn. Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.

Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. Don't hate others.

Make peace with your past so it won't spoil the present.

Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.

What other people think of you is none of your business.

However good or bad a situation is, it will change.

Story of a Tea Cup

Story of a Tea Cup

"There was a time when I was just a dumb lump of red clay. Then one day my master came. He took me, brought me home, rolled and pounded me on a wooden table. Again and again, he poked his fingers into me until finally I yelled out: 'Don't do that! Leave me alone!' But he only smiled and gently said: "Not yet!"

Then, whoommmm! I was placed on a spinning wheel and suddenly spun around and around and around until I lost all my sense of direction: 'Stop it; don't you see that I'm getting sick? Quickly, take me from the spinning wheel!' But the master only nodded in understanding and quietly said: "Not yet!"

Then he placed me carefully into an oven. I never felt such heat. I yelled and knocked and pounded at the door: 'It is hotter than hell - I'm burning to ashes. Please get me out of here before it is too late.' I could only read his lips as he shook his head from side to side and silently pronounced, "Not yet!"

After I had cooled down he carefully picked me up, looked at me and brushed some dust away. Then he brought the colors! The fumes were horrible! 'Please... you have no mercy! Please, Stop it!' But he only shook his head and said: "Not yet!"

An hour or later he came back and placed a mirror before me and said: "Look at yourself!" And I did.What I saw amazed me. 'That's not me!' I said. 'It is too beautiful...' With a very compassionate voice he spoke: "This is what you are meant to be," and then he explained: "I know it hurt you when I rolled and kneaded you on the table. But if I had not gotten the air out of you, you would have broken. I knew you must have lost all your sense of orientation when I was spinning you. But without this you would never have come into this form. I know the fumes of the colors were intolerable when I painted you all over. But if I had not done that, you would not have had any color in your life."

God is the potter and we are the clay. He will mold us and will expose us to just enough pressures of just the right kinds that we will become a perfect piece of His liking. 

Seek first to understand and then be understood

Seek first to understand and then be understood
 
Essentially, “seek first to understand” implies that you become more interested in understanding others and less in having other people understand you. It means mastering the idea that if you want quality, fulfilling communication that is nourishing to you and others; understanding others must come first.

When you understand where people are coming from, what they are trying to say, what’s important to them, and so forth, being understood flows naturally; it falls into place with virtually no effort. When you reverse this process, however (which is what most of us do most of the time), you are putting the cart before the horse.

When you try to be understood before you understand, the effort you exert will be felt by you and the person or people you are trying to reach. Communication will break down, and you may end up with a battle of two egos.

Seeking first to understand isn’t about who’s right or wrong. It is a philosophy of effective communication. When you practice this method you’ll notice that the people you communicate with will feel listened to, heard, and understood. This will translate into better and more loving relationships.

Develop your compassion


Develop your compassion

Compassion is a sympathetic feeling. It involves the willingness to put yourself in someone else’s shoes, to take the focus off yourself and to imagine what it’s like to be in someone else’s predicament, and simultaneously, to feel love for that person.

Compassion is the recognition that other people’s problems, their pain and frustrations, are every bit as real as our own---often far worse. In recognizing this fact and trying to offer some assistance, we open our own hearts and greatly enhance our sense of gratitude.

Compassion is something you can develop with practice. It involves two things: intention and action. Intention simply means you remember to open your heart to others; you expand what and who matters, from yourself to other people. Action is simply the “what you do about it.”

Compassion develops your sense of gratitude by taking your attention off all the little things that most of us have learned to take too seriously.

Don't interrupt others or finish their sentences


Don't interrupt others or finish their sentences

When you interrupt someone, or finish his or her sentence, you have to keep track not only of your own thoughts but of those of the person you are interrupting as well.

This tendency (which, by the way, is extremely common in busy people), encourages both parties to speed up their speech and their thinking. This, in turn, makes both people nervous, irritable, and annoyed. It is also the cause of many arguments, because if there’s one thing almost everyone resents, it’s someone who doesn’t listen to what they are saying.

Once you begin noticing yourself interrupting other, you’ll see that this tendency is nothing more than an innocent habit that has become invisible to you. This is good news because it means that all you really have to do is to begin catching yourself when you forget. Remind yourself (before a conversation begins, if possible) to be patient and wait. Tell yourself to allow the other person to finish speaking before you take your turn.

You’ll notice, right away, how much the interactions with the people in your life will improve as a direct result of this simple act. The people you communicate with will feel much more relaxed around you when they feel heard and listened to. You’ll also notice how much more relaxed you’ll feel when you stop interrupting others. Your heart and pulse rates will slow down, and you’ll begin to enjoy your conversations rather than rush through them.

This is an easy way to become a more relaxed and loving person.

Silence your greatest critic - You!


Silence your greatest critic - You!

Many people spend a great deal of energy arguing for their own limitations; “I can’t do that,” “I can’t help it, I’ve always been that way,” and thousands of other negative and self-defeating statements.

Our minds are powerful instruments. When we decide that something is true or beyond our reach, it’s very difficult to pierce through this self-created hurdle.

Suppose, for example, you tell yourself, “I can’t write,” You’ll look for examples to prove your position. You’ll remember your poor essays in high school, or recall how awkward you felt the last time you sat down to write a letter. You’ll fill your head with limitations that will frighten you from trying.

In order to become a writer or anything else, the first step is to silence your greatest critic --- YOU!

Become a better listener

Become a better listener

Effective listening is more than simply avoiding the bad habit of interrupting others while they are speaking or finishing their sentences. It’s being content to listen to the entire thought of someone rather than waiting impatiently for your chance to respond.

In some ways, the way we fail to listen is symbolic of the way we live. We often treat communication as if it were a race. It’s almost like our goal is to have no time gaps between the conclusion of the sentences of the person we are speaking with and the beginning of our own.

Slowing down your responses and becoming a better listener aids you in becoming a more peaceful person. It takes pressure from you. If you think about it, you’ll notice that it takes an enormous amount of energy and is very stressful to be sitting at the edge of your seat trying to guess what the person in front of you (or on the telephone) is going to say so that you can fire back your response. But as you wait for the people you are communicating with to finish, as you simply listen more intently to what is being said, you’ll feel more relaxed, and so will the people you are talking to. They will feel safe in slowing down their own responses because they won’t feel in competition with you for “airtime”!

Not only will becoming a better listener make you a more patient person, it will also enhance the quality of your relationships. Everyone loves to talk to someone who truly listens to what they are saying.

Power of Your Own Thoughts


Power of Your Own Thoughts

It is important to know that there is a relationship between your thinking and the way you feel. It’s important to realize that you are constantly thinking. Don’t be fooled into believing that you are already aware of this fact! Think, for a moment, about your breathing. Until this moment, when you are reading this sentence, you had certainly lost sight of the fact that you were doing it. The truth is, unless you are out of breath, you simply forget that it’s occurring.

Thinking works in the same way. Because you’re always doing it, it’s easy to forget that it’s happening, and it becomes invisible to you. Unlike breathing, however, forgetting that you are thinking can cause some serious problems in your life, such as unhappiness, anger, inner conflicts, and stress. The reason this is true is that your thinking will always come back to you as a feeling.

Try getting angry without first having angry thoughts! Okay, now try feeling stressed out without first having stressful thoughts – or jealous without thoughts of jealousy. You can’t do it – it’s impossible. The truth is, in order to experience a feeling; you must first have a thought that produces that feeling.

Unhappiness doesn’t and can’t exist on its own. Unhappiness is the feeling that accompanies negative thinking about your life. In the absence of that thinking, the unhappiness, or stress, or jealousy, can’t exist. There is nothing to hold your negative feelings in place other than your own thinking. The next time you’re feeling upset, notice your thinking – it will be negative. 

Remind yourself that it’s your thinking that is negative, not your life. This simple awareness will be the first step in putting you back on the path toward happiness. It takes practice, but you can get to the point where you treat your negative thoughts in much the same way you would treat flies at a picnic: You shoo them away and get on with your day.